Chapter 5
第五章
"Please have a seat," he said.
“请坐。”他说。
Tracy was glad to sit down. Her knees were weak. He was going to tell her now about Charles, and how soon she would be released.
特蕾西很高兴能坐下。她的双膝已经难以支撑了。他就要跟她谈到查尔斯,以及她何时获释的问题。
"I've been looking over your record," the warden began.
“我一直在研究你的档案,”监狱长开始说。
Charles would have asked him to do that.
查尔斯当然会要求他这样做的。
"I see you're going to be with us a long time. Your sentence is fifteen years."
“我知道你要和我们一起呆很久。你的刑期是十五年。”
It took a moment for his words to sink in. Something was dreadfully wrong. "Didn't--- didn't you speak to--- to Charles?" In her nervousness she was stammering.
过了一会儿,她才明白他的话。又是一次可怕的误会。“您没——没跟——跟查尔斯谈过吗?”她紧张得结巴起来。
He looked at her blankly. "Charles?"
他莫名其妙地望着她:“查尔斯?”
And she knew. Her stomach turned to water. "Please," she said. "Please listen to me. I'm innocent. I don't belong here."
她明白了。她的心一下凉了:“请您,”她说,“请您听我说。我是冤枉的,我不该呆在这里。”
How many times had he heard that? A hundred? A thousand? I'm innocent.
这种话他听过多少次了?一百次?一千次?“我是冤枉的。”
He said, "The courts have found you guilty. The best advice I can give you is to try to do easy time. Once you accept the terms of your imprisonment, it will be a lot easier for you. There are no clocks in prison, only calendars."
他说:“法庭已认定你有罪。我能给你的最好的忠告就是随遇而安。你一旦认可了你的刑期,你就会感到好过多了,监狱里没有时钟,只有日历。”
I can't be locked up here for fifteen years, Tracy thought in despair. I want to die. Please, God, let me die. But I can't die, can I? I would be killing my baby. It's your baby, too, Charles. Why aren't you here helping me? That was the moment she began to hate him.
我不能在这里被关上十五年,特蕾西绝望地想,我想死。求求你,上帝,让我去死吧。不,我不能死,我怎么能死呢?我会杀死我的孩子的。查尔斯,他也是你的孩子。你为什么不来救我呢?这时,她开始恨他了。
"If you have any special problems,", Warden Brannigan said, "I mean, if I can help you in any way, I want you to come see me." Even as he spoke, he knew how hollow his words were. She was young and beautiful and fresh. The bull-dykes in the prison would fall on her like animals. There was not even a safe cell to which he could assign her. Nearly every cell was controlled by a stud. Warden Brannigan had heard rumors of rapes in the showers, in the toilets, and in the corridors at night. But they were only rumors, because the victims were always silent afterward. Or dead.
“你如果有什么特别的问题,”布兰里根监狱长说,“我的意思是,如果我能帮你什么忙,希望你能来找我。”甚至就在他说这些话时,他就意识到他的话是多么空洞。她年轻、漂亮、没有阅历。狱中搞同性恋的女犯人会象野兽一样扑到她身上。他甚至想不出有哪间安全的牢房能安排给她。几乎所有的牢房都被一名同性恋控制着。布兰里根监狱长听说过在洗澡间、厕所以及深夜在走廊里发生的强xx事件。但那只是传说,因为受害者事后都不吭声,否则便没命了。
Warden Brannigan said gently, "With good behavior, you might be released in twelve or---"
布兰里根监狱长和蔼地说:“如果表现好的话,你可以在十二年或短的时间内获得释放。”