诚意出品:1.演讲设计经过、预期及观众实际反应;2.如何从观众角度考虑,避免和观众发生观念冲突;3.如何完成CC project 的要求;4. 你们要的Q&A;
CC6目标:
1.变化音量、音调、语速和音色,反映你要传达的内容,增加信息的内涵和趣味;
2.适当停顿,提升信息的质量;
3.自然流畅地变化声音
以下是《如何干脆利落地分手》演讲稿英文版(Break up,once and for all)。我将结合演讲稿每个段落,分析摘要中的1.2.3 点。第4点在最后。
Last week I told you that my mother loved the drama. She was unsatisfied with my straight breaking up.
[内容设计]
1.drama:承上启下,预热气氛
2.straight breaking up:上一次演讲内容确实有包括分手后拉黑的剧情,而这一次演讲内容就是为什么要干脆,如何做到干脆。所以用这一句作为开头。
[为观众考虑]
写黑板:“straight 干脆的” 。其实我演讲稿里面对于初级学习者来说比较高级的词还是有很多的,考虑把这个词写在小黑板上:(1)引申义知道的人不多;(2)这个词和主题关系非常紧密;(3)不太容易通过上下文和表情猜测词义
[CC6目标:声音变化]
“straight”前后停顿0.5秒,重读(注意和观众眼神交流)
Several days ago, she asked me again, “ He didn’t come to wait downstairs to talk with you for even once? It turned out that he was not that into you. He didn’t love you!”Deep in my heart I wanted to roll my eyes and make this gesture at her.
[内容设计]
1.吸引注意力:观众喜欢听故事(ba gua);
2. 和观众拉近距离:自曝和自嘲这两大招一直都很好用;
3. 留下悬念:我到底是怎么分手的,人家都不来找我了。
[随机应变]
这里特意设计了一个表情(伸手用中指推眼镜,严肃脸,看天花板)观众们没有笑,真是失望。于是融入“当日单词”:salty(bitter mood),低头作悲伤状,小声说“I am a little salty” ——
1.不论观众有没有笑,总算完成Grammarian布置的任务;
2. 如果没有get 到笑点,观众也还是可以接受自嘲的姿势;
3.自嘲以后,演讲者自己不会因为观众反应未达预期而影响接下来的发挥(观众居然不笑,宝宝心里咸!)
But I controlled myself, keeping my face blank, “No. I never expected that. I make sure of that. I already told him on Wechat that I had thought it over for ten days and that was my final decision. Plus, I left him with a badminton bat, which means “一拍两散” .
[内容设计]
1.此段为了控制时间(开头用时占全篇用时10-20%为宜,需在排练中确定和调整时长)有删减内容,留下一个笑点(可是没人笑);
2. 预先展示效果:按照我的步骤走,保证你的分手一劳永逸,绝不拖泥带水!
[CC6目标:声音变化]
1.引号里面每一句后面0.5秒停顿,前两句和第三句前半段用云淡风轻的声音说;
2.“ten days” 和 “my final decision” 一字一顿重读(和观众目光交流)
[表情设计]
第一句严肃脸,第二句果决脸,第三句神秘的微笑脸。
[随机应变]
“which means” 后临时加“I have to say it in Chinese” ,也是给观众反应时间;
只有我的馒头(Mentor)无奈地笑了!算了,顺其自然,往下说吧。回看视频,原来是我把bat(重要的“拍”!)这个词漏掉了,难怪观众没get到。所以亲爱的们,可以交代小伙伴用你的手机帮你拍视频,这样你可以很清楚地知道自己的问题在哪里。
I don’t know how many of you enjoy the drama of “breaking up and back together again and again”. For me I prefer a once-and-for-all style. I still have to find my true love. The last thing I want is that my potential true love misunderstands that I already have a boyfriend! For girls who dislike drama, I have three personal suggestions to share with you.
[内容设计]
其实这里也算开头,但是算进去开头就太长了,所以算过渡吧(无耻脸)。考虑过要不要全删掉,但是还是留住了(已经删减某些“不想浪费时间和精力”的内容),因为:
1. 不想大家觉得我是个冷酷无情的人,说明自己为什么要“干脆地分手”,争取观众的理解;
2.可能大多数女生分手都是不干脆的(说错了请拍砖),想减轻大家对“干脆分手”的反感,所以用“I don’t know”开头,希望显得比较客气一些;
3. “true love”:为那些需要知道如何干脆分手 & 不理解为什么要干脆分手的人点亮希望之灯:你们还有真爱要去寻找!别拖了!
[为观众考虑]
其实我CC5就想做这个题目的演讲,但是怕引起价值观冲突,不知道该怎么处理。Why?因为毕竟大多数情况下,分手是一件悲伤痛苦的事情。
1.我不想让观众(尤其是男生)觉得我不尊重情感,漠视他们(单身&非单身)的感情;
2. 有小伙伴后面跟我说,听了我的演讲,从我的角度理解了前女友的想法,终于明白前女友要追求的幸福自己给不了,他就对分手这件事释然了(宝宝很开心!做个演讲分享自己的经验,不仅让大家觉得有趣,还解了someone的心结,比拿了十万软妹币出场费还高兴!)
[表情设计]
无。顺其自然。入戏的时候什么表情就什么表情。
[CC6目标:声音变化]
没有特别的声音设计,但是“true love”那两句的声音可能比较夸张,两句话都没有停顿,喷薄而出, 带一点点哭腔的呼喊(有人笑了,蛮意外的)。
Step One: Make up your mind
There is always a special moment when you suddenly discover, or finally decide, “this is not the guy I want to be with”, or “I deserve a better one”. When this moment comes, keep calm. Think it over. If you understand that it would be best for both of you if you were apart,make that decision. If you don’t make up your mind, it’s natural for you to be persuaded by your boyfriend to stay. And then——the drama of “breaking up and back together again and again” is on.
[内容设计]
1.为了把演讲控制在七分钟以内,有删减内容
2.“moment” 那一句是为了过渡,引出下文。没想到也起到了帮助男性观众理解女生想法的作用。
[为观众考虑]
1.“moment” 的内容:作为女生,我经过这样的瞬间,对女生的心情真是太懂了,这一句会引起共鸣;
2.“Keep calm. Think it over”:泣血建议,不解释;我们要严肃认真地对待每一段关系,离开当然要想清楚;
3.“If you don’t make up your mind”:打预防针。如果你们不喜欢“分合大戏”,听了我的演讲,还是去演“分合大戏”,我不是白讲了。所以要把可能后果讲清楚,也是引起观众对这个要点的重视。
[CC6目标:声音变化]
从这里开始是演讲内容的核心,声音设计体现得比较多。“Step“那一句为小标题,要停顿1秒钟;段落结束后,停顿2-3秒钟,给观众时间去消化这些信息。以下三段都是如此。
1.“keep calm”、“Think it over” 和“make that decision” 是关键内容,又是短句,一字一顿重读,目光交流,手势配合(CC5目标:肢体语言)
2. “stay” 拖长、重读:这是不干脆分手的后果,要强调
3.其他没那么重要的内容,比如“If”引导的条件句和“the drama”那一句,上下文有类似内容,理解难度也比较小,可以适当加快语速。
Step Two: Build a safe way out
Your ex-to-be may well know where you live! And may even have the key to your apartment! It never does you any good if he holds any grudge against you! Doctor Vincent will tell you it is impossible to fully know about human nature! You have to consider your own security! So you would better say something nice to him, praise him, thank him for all the nice things he has done for you. In doing this, you make yourself look decent and elegant. Most importantly, this is the the best way for your heart to say “Goodbye”.
[内容设计]
1.为了把演讲控制在七分钟以内,有删减内容(不要指责、怪罪对方,不要说对方缺点,解释这样做为什么没有用)
2. 为了演讲内容更连贯,观众更容易理解,临时调整这一段的顺序,加上最后两句的内容(Lien编剧亲身经历的结晶,浓缩为两句话,不知道有多少人能懂)
3.“Doctor Vincent”那一句:(1)和观众互动,活跃气氛(大家果然觉得有趣)(2)Vincent接下来要做有关ICU内情的演讲,正好为他暖场(作为医生,真的比一般人对人性有更深刻的体悟,我也知道这样提他不会生气的)(3)转移焦点,不想让大家觉得是我经历了什么不好的事情(神秘的微笑脸)
[为观众考虑]
1.这一段:主要是为了提醒女生,现在各种人身安全事件太多啦
2.最后一句:体谅每个人离开一段关系都会有依依不舍的心情。
[CC6目标:声音变化]
1.带感叹号的前四句:大声,目光交流;
2.“heart”重读,引导读者充分理解
Step Three is quite easy. Just break up with him through e-mail, telephone, Wechat, or face to face. Choose a way which is proper and effective for you. Once my male friend suggested me to break up on telephone to show some respect. I suffered for two more months just because l couldn’t speak out the words!
[内容设计]
1.有删减和主题关系不大的内容;
2.解释列举这些分手方式的原因:不是漠视这段关系,实在是说不出口啊!
3.举例“male friend”的建议,争取男性观众理解:我不是不尊重男人,实在是不干脆分不了手啊!
4.比较谨慎地不添加过多私人经历:(1)观众未必想听;(2)和主题无关(时间有限);(3)自己不想讲。
[CC6目标:声音变化]
“two more months” 和“speak out the words! ”拖长、重读:血泪教训,当然要强调啦
Anyway that’s my lesson. Now you have broken up with your boyfriend through Step One:making up your mind; Step Two, preparing for a safe way out and Step Three, straightly breaking up. Congratulations. However, A tough task remains to be finished. That is, tell this news to your parents who is still dreaming about your marriage. Your parents may have a more difficult time than your new ex! Don’t worry,I have three master strokes to help you.
[内容设计]
1.“Anyway” 过渡句:把大家从痛苦的情绪中拉出来;
2.“Now” 总结要点;
3.“However”引出下文;
4.倒数第三句和倒数第二句:强调任务的艰巨性(个人经历,相信也是中国国情),铺垫“三大招”的必要性;
5.“Don’t worry” 引起观众担忧之情后给个出路:快来听!本来排练时打算加上“In fact this is the very part I would like to share with you, which may be the key part of my speech. Listen carefully!”但是临场发挥的时候忘记了(所以排练很重要!如果精心准备的点忘记了,多可惜!)
[为观众考虑]
写黑板: “Master stroke 大招”:
(1)这个词组我通过汉英词典查到,在词典里面释义是“绝招”,我改成“大招”:流行词嘛,朗朗上口;(2)会议开始前大家就会看到,制造悬念和幽默气氛;(3)提醒大家留意干货分享:在我说到这个词的时候(再加上手势),他们的大脑就会把我说的单词和黑板上的释义联系起来。
[CC6目标:声音变化]
“Anyway”那一句:低头恢复inner peace 的声音;
“step”的那几个排比句:Step one/two/three 后停顿1秒钟;每一个小点后停顿1-2秒钟;
Congratulations:轻松的声音,亲切的微笑,就是那种经典的“祝贺”脸。(这里是想营造一点喜剧效果——把干脆地分手当作一件有挑战性的任务——可是大家没什么反应);
4. “dreaming about your marriage”和“more difficult time”:用夸张的语调描绘出冷冰冰的现实(变相委婉的逼婚和变相委婉的干涉);
5. “new ex”:一字一顿重读:强调你刚刚成功分手啦!
6. 最后一句语气缓下来
Stroke one:keep your boyfriend away from your parents. When you have a relationship and you are not ready to marry, don’t ever tell them the good sides of your boyfriend, especially the strong points for marriage. Otherwise they may try to talk you back into that relationship!
[内容设计]
写到这里已经过去六个小时,实在没力气详细分析了,姑且概括为我的“编剧天赋”,以下两段同,如果有什么想问的(包括花絮),赞赏我(意味深长坏笑脸)。
[CC6目标:声音变化]
Stroke one/two/three 后停顿1秒钟;“Stroke“那一句后,要停顿1秒钟;段落结束后,停顿2-3秒钟,给观众时间去消化这些信息。以下两段都是如此。
1.“don’t ever” 一字一顿重读(力度和“make that decision”差不多):前方干货预警
2. “good……”、“ strong ……marriage” 和“talk……back”的back:强调重点词
3. 最后一句:夸张语调,营造危机感,引起观众重视
Secondly, prepare your parents physically in advance. Complain to them about how mean he treats you. Make stories if it is necessary. I am here if you need me.
“Complain” 重读(这是大招啊!大招啊!)
“Make stories”:语重心长痛心疾首的语调(嘿嘿,有人笑了)。
最后一句低声快速说:(1)非关键内容;(2)我的宣传理念是:做广告要低调优雅有内涵,表现得漫不经心才能收到好效果(立志做个低调优雅的广告人/编剧)
Thirdly, make sure your parents see your performance. Before breaking up——“To be or not to be, is the question. Life, is just, endless, pain” After breaking up——“I felt so alive!Life is amazing!Life is so beautiful!Endless possibilities are open!”Your parents will be as happy as your potential true love to see you are single again!
[内容设计]
1.本来第二句本来是没有的,主要通过身体语言表现,但是觉得比较幼稚粗俗没调性,和我一贯高冷优雅的风格不协调,和演讲的风格也不协调,显得很突兀,也未必很有幽默效果,于是临时改掉。
2.最后一句也是路上冒出来的灵感:(1)用不正经的态度说出正经的真相:父母都是爱子女的,都是为了子女的幸福而幸福;(2)把注意力从“分手”拉到“真爱”上面,给大家希望:现在开始!追求真爱!(嗯,CC7 speech 我要做如何追求真爱的演讲,敬请期待!)
[CC6目标:声音变化]
这是CC6目标“声音变化”的精华体现!下方高能预警!
1.“see your performance” 一句一顿:主题句诶,关键内容提示,抓回观众注意力。
2. “Before/After breaking up” :严肃脸,一字一顿(之前和之后差别可大了!一定要重读)这是场景切换句,很关键的,认真念。
3. SHOW ON!!!——分手前:声音低沉忧伤,叹气徘徊;分手后:声音高亢兴奋,满脸微笑,两眼放光;
4. 最后一句,重读“potential true love” 和“single” ,用“终于复活”的兴奋语调。
Those three master strokes(绝招)will save you tons of time to deal with your parents.Those are my personal suggestions. I wish you all fill find true love and enjoy happiness in your romantic relationship.
[内容设计]
1.匆忙结尾 临场发挥的时候,忘记第一句讲没讲了==
因为时间有限被砍掉的 Q & A session
Q:请问Lien 小姐,你到底谈过几次恋爱?怎么有这么痛的领悟(丰富的经验)?
A:“我……(摊开双手,看了看)我不确定到底谈过几次,因为咩有一次真爱啊!”
内心戏:别说我是salty dog!(本次meeting 被玩坏的生词:salty dog,有小伙伴给出神翻译:老司机,我这职业翻译甘心跪倒)微信心理测试结果说我是白莲花!纯洁度百分百!要相信科学!