Vocabulary

suffocate v.使呼吸困难;使憋闷；

受束缚;受扼制；

Most of our neighbors in Fremont were bus drivers, policemen, gas station attendants, and unwed mothers collecting welfare, exactly the sort of blue-collar people who would soon suffocate under the pillow Reganomics pressed to their faces. Baba was the lone Republican in our building.

Excerpt

I glanced at him across the table, his nails chipped and black with engine oil, his knuckles scraped, the smells of the gas station--dust, sweat, and gasoline--on his clothes. Baba was like the widower who remarries but can't let go of his dead wife.

For me, America was a place to bury my memories.

For Baba, a place to mourn his.

He smiled and leaned back against the headrest, his forehead almost touching the ceiling. We didn’t say anything. Just sat in the dark, listened to the tink-tink of the engine cooling, the wail of a siren in the distance. Then Baba rolled his head toward me. “I wish Hassan had been with us today,” he said.

A pair of steel hands closed around my windpipe at the sound of Hassan’s name. I rolled down the window. Waited for the steel hands to loosen their grip.

SOMETIMES, I GOT BEHIND the wheel of my Ford, rolled down the windows, and drove for hours, from the East Bay to the South Bay, up the Peninsula and back. I drove through the grids of cottonwood-lined streets in our Fremont neighborhood, where people who'd never shaken hands with kings lived in shabby, flat one-story houses with barred windows, where old cars like mine dripped oil on blacktop driveways. Pencil gray chain-link fences closed off the backyards in our neighborhood. Toys, bald tires, and beer bottles with peeling labels littered unkempt front lawns.

阿米尔和父亲对美国的感受是不同的，曾风光一时的爸爸现在每日为自己和儿子的生存而奔波。

Thought

Is there love between Amir and Baba? Of course there is. After moving to the United States, Amir finally got what he used to be long for—Baba’s exclusive love. Baba's love are everywhere, to name some as follows:

Although Baba didn't fully support what Amir want to learn so he said:

“Oh,” he said. “Wah wah! So, if I understand, you'll study several years to earn a degree, then you'll get a chatti job like mine, one you could just as easily land today, on the small chance that your degree might someday help you get... discovered.” He took a deep breath and sipped his tea. Grunted something about medical school, law school, and “real work.”

Amir's action again shows his selfishness:

My cheeks burned and guilt coursed through me, the guilt of indulging myself at the expense of his ulcer, his black fingernails and aching wrists. But I would stand my ground, I decided. I didn't want to sacrifice for Baba anymore. The last time I had done that, I had damned myself.

Baba sighed and, this time, tossed a whole handful of car damom seeds in his mouth.

Nevertheless, Baba was proud of his son in his way. At the flea market, Baba’s words illustrated that clearly:

“Amir is going to be a great writer,”Baba said. I did a double take at this. “He has finished his first year of college and earned A's in all of his courses.”

No doubt that he is not only a great man, but a great father as well.

Notes

Amir和Baba移居美国，Baba成为了加油站员工，我则在美国高中学习。Amir如愿以偿，终于得到了Baba独有的爱，因为Baba只有他了。Baba还是Baba，坚毅，勤劳，努力拼搏在美国自食其力。而Amir也还是Amir，自私自利，像寄生虫一样吸Baba的血，所作的一切都是为了自己。好在Amir珍惜在美国的日子，在这片新土地，他放下了过去，开始了新生活。他努力学习，在Baba供养自己的时候，也努力保护Baba，帮助Baba适应美国的生活。哪个家长不是真正爱自己的孩子？就算Amir懦弱自私，和自己罕有相似之处，Baba还是爱他，担心他，为Amir的小成绩而骄傲。Baba在辛劳和苦痛中慢慢老去，Amir成年，升入大学，开始迈向社会。

What's More

当Amir和Baba到达美国时，两人一无所有，虽然有签证，但是教育方面不享受福利（这一点留学的同学应该也都深有感触）。加油站的收入微薄，但爸爸还是坚持让孩子接受教育，上ESL课程，完成美国初高中学习，并拒绝让孩子过早工作而是升大学。人穷志不穷，Baba宁可自己日夜辛劳疾病缠身也必须保证孩子的教育。曾经的上等阶层深知，若要回到原阶层，或保证阶层的稳固地位，孩子的教育是第一位，只有知识才能引导下一代向上一阶层攀登。虽然当问到孩子大学要学什么时，Amir的回答让父亲有些失望，但父亲并没有强迫孩子改变自己的兴趣，而是尝试改变自己，以此为荣。