CH5 You are alway choosing
1.What does “you are always choosing”? Can you define it and give an example?
It means you need to always make choices in life. For example, you can work for money or work for your likes.
2.What’s the point of telling William James’s story?
The story told us that we can't change what had happened to us, but we can change our attitude. This is what we can control.
3.Any responsibility problems you had with your boyfriend/girlfriend or parents? If any, please tell us your story.
I always gets angry easily with my parents. Looking back, I thought every mistake is made by them, so I had no responsibility for quarreling. But now when I try to put myself into their shoes, I can understand them well.
感想
从这一章开始作者详细阐述他认为正确的价值观或者说原则。
这一章说的就是要学会承担责任。
我们无法选择已经发生了的事,但可以选择对待这件事的态度。这是我们可以掌控的。很多时候我们觉得苦恼其实就来源于自己的无助和无能。
怎样才能获得更多的掌控权?-学会承担责任
The more we choose to accept responsibility in our lives, the more power we will exercise over our lives. Accepting responsibility for our problems is thus the first step to solving them.
因为你自己才是你唯一可以控制的人。比如作者在书中说的被女朋友劈腿,除了觉得是女友辜负了自己,作者也开始思考以前自己对待她的方式。让自己承担责任就是一个反思自己的过程,这样才可能避免以后掉进同一个坑。
当然也不是说被劈腿这件事是你的错,这里需要区分错误和承担责任两个概念。错误是已经发生的过去的事情了,而责任是现在你可以去选择的,掌控的。
Faulty is past tense. Responsibility is present tense. Fault results from choices that had already been made. Responsibility results from the choices you're currently making.
字词
1.salvage /ˈsælvɪdʒ/
In a desperate attempt to salvage the young man’s future, James’s father used his business connections to get him admitted into Harvard Medical School.
. to save something from an accident or bad situation in which other things have already been damaged, destroyed, or lost:挽救
salvage something from something
例:They managed to salvage only a few of their belongings from the fire.
造句:The policeman salvage a girl from the deadly shooting accidents.
2.appeal to
Medicine never appealed to him.
if someone or something appeals to you, they seem attractive and interesting 同义be attractive
例:The idea of working abroad really appeals to me.
造句:A mobile game called a frog's journey appeals to the young.
3.home in on
The few times he did, he would home in on the smallest behaviors from any woman he talked with that.
home in on something phrasal verb
1. to aim exactly at an object or place and move directly to it:
The bat can home in on insects using a kind of ‘radar’.
2. to direct your efforts or attention towards a particular fault or problem:
He homed in on the one weak link in the argument.
4. brush off
In hindsight, I was able to look back and see warning signs of my exgirlfriend’s character, signs I had chosen to ignore or brush off when I was with her.
rude or unfriendly behaviour that shows you are not interested in someone:
She gave him the brush-off.
I tried to be friendly but I just got the brush-off.
5.credit with
I credit it with inspiring a significant amount of personal growth.
credit somebody with (doing) something to: believe or admit that someone has a quality, or has done something good:
Jack Ma is credited with inventing online shopping in China