[每日翻译】没有牵绊,没有孩子,没有遗憾No ties, no kids and no regrets

每日在简书发布一篇自己的翻译一篇文章,文章来源于每日中国Daily China,希望提升英文水平。今日的文章如下:

No ties, no kids and no regrets

没有牵绊,没有孩子,没有牵挂

By Chen Meiling | China Daily | Updated: 2020-10-24 09:15

[Illustration by Liang Luwen/China Daily]

Katie Peng has been footloose and fancy-free for four years now, and if there is any shadow of regret about her life as a single woman she is certainly not showing it.

彭凯蒂已经连续四年过着无拘无束、自由自在的日子,作为单身女性,她生活没有任何遗憾。

In fact it is OK never to marry or have a child if you cannot find a suitable partner, she says, adding that many of her female friends feel the same way. "Chinese society has become more inclusive, because such comment would have been regarded as outrageous and abnormal several years ago," Peng, 30, says.

“事实上,如果你找不到一个合适的伴侣,可以不结婚或者不要小孩。”她说道。她又表示,我身边的许多女性朋友也有同感。“中国社会现在更加包容,几年前,这种言论被认为是无法容忍的、反常的。”

The last time she had a boyfriend was in 2016, and in recent years all her former boyfriends have married and some have children, but she has made peace with it.

她上次交往过一个男朋友,时间还要回溯到2016年。最近几年,她的前任男友们都结婚了,而且有些前任已经有了小孩,她也对于生活中的这种结果和解了。

"As a small girl I had a vision of marrying and being blissfully happy, but when I got to 25 and was earning quite a bit of money I realized you don't have to marry if you don't want to. After all, there's more than one road to happiness."

她分享到:“当我是个小女孩的 时候,我思考过婚姻以及婚后幸福生活。但是当我25岁的时候,我赚了很多钱,也有了新的认识,你如果不想要走入婚姻,不需要结婚。毕竟,通往幸福的路,不止这一条。”

Peng, a public relations worker for an internet company in Shenzhen, Guangdong province, says her annual salary is now 400,000 yuan ($59,200), 10 times what it was nine years ago. She rents a 65-square-meter apartment. On weekends she dines out with friends.

彭凯蒂,是广东省深圳市一网络公司的公关人员,说到她年收入有40万元(折合为59,200美元),收入已经变为九年前的十倍。她租一套65平米的房子。周末她会邀约朋友一起外出吃饭。

She moved to the city last year after living in Beijing for 11 years, to "jump out of my comfort zone" and "to explore more possibilities". Asked if she plans to buy a house and establish a family there, she says no, because many different things could happen in her life.

彭凯蒂在北京奋斗了11年后,想要跳出生活舒适区,探索更多的生活的可能性,去年成为一个“深漂”,来到粤港澳大湾区深圳这座城市。询问她是否计划买个房子,在这里成家,她回复并不想,因为未来生活还有很多可能性,期待许多精彩事情会发生。

In traditional Chinese culture, those reaching the age of 30 are expected to settle down to marital life after having had a few career achievements. However, more and more modern women are refusing to fit in with that stereotype.

在传统中国文化中,三十而立,在职场奋斗多年后,应该要安定下来有安稳的生活。然后,越来越多的现代女性拒绝这种刻板印象。

Peng says she has no fears of remaining single; the thing that really worries her is marrying the wrong man.

彭凯蒂说单身的状态并不会让人感到恐惧,真正让人担心的是遇到不合适的人,嫁错了人。

She tells of the blind date she once had with a Beijinger who had been recommended to her by a workmate. When they met, the man's first question was:"When do you plan to quit work?" He explained that he was a very busy man and that the woman he married would need to dedicate all of her time to looking after her family.

她说自己曾经与一个北京人相亲,是同事推荐的。在相亲的时候,对方第一个问题就是“你什么时候准备停止工作?”对方表示自己是个忙碌的商业人士,他要结婚的对象要投入所有的时间去照顾家庭。

She felt angry about it at the time, she says, but now laughs it off, saying: "He did nothing wrong. We just failed to make a deal."

当时她很生气,但是后来释怀了。她说,他没有做错什么,只是我们不适合而已。

She sees the prospect of child raising and all it brings-"infant dairy formula, nannies, toys and training courses"-as the ultimate joy killer.

她看到带小孩的未来,喂养小孩、保姆、玩具、培训课程……所有这一切会让快乐消失得无影无踪。

"The more time, effort and money you devote to children, the less is left for you. I can never see myself tightening my belt for that kind of lifestyle."

“你在小孩身上花费的时间、精力和钱越多,你能留给自己的越少。我无法把自己与那种生活方式捆绑在一起。”

The high cost of raising children and the prospect of having to forgo a relaxed, comfortable life are some of the things that young people find so scary about marriage. The proportion of one-person families in China rose from 6 percent in 1990 to 14.6 percent in 2013 and 16.7 percent in 2018, the Ministry of Civil Affairs says. There are now 240 million Chinese adults of marriageable age who are either single or divorced.

养育小孩的高成本以及婚后不得不放弃一种释怀的、舒适的生活方式,是很多年轻人认为婚姻很恐怖的原因。人社部表示,在中国,“一人家庭”的比例不断提升,从1990的6%变为2013年的14.6%,2018年增长到16.7%。目前有2.4亿中国适婚年龄的成年人要么单身,要么离婚。

Peng says she is not worried about leading a single life because new services or products will emerge to meet the demands of single seniors, such as apartments in Japan for older people. She has not abandoned the idea of finding romance, either, or indeed of eventually having children, and has plans to have her eggs kept in cold storage overseas.

彭凯蒂说,她并担心过一种单身生活,因为新的服务和产品将不断涌现,适应单身老年人的需求,比如日本就有老年人准备的公寓。她也没有放弃对于找到幸福另一半,结婚生子的期待,并计划将海外冻卵。

Many Chinese regard 30 as a deadline for women to give birth, bearing in mind what for them the optimal reproductive age is, so many women around that age feel intense and sometimes unrelenting pressure, often from their parents, to find a spouse as soon as possible.

很多中国人认为30岁是女人的截至时间,是生孩子的最佳时间。很多女性在30岁左后就会感到前所未有的压力。父母会催促尽快找到另一半。

A single woman may be highly educated and have a highly successful career, but in many people's minds the fact that she is unmarried will offset those positive aspects, says Zeng Xiangmin, a professor at the Television School, Communication University of China.

中国通信学校电视学院的一位教授,曾向敏表示,单身女性虽然受教育程度高、职场有成,在很多人眼中,只要没有结婚就抵消了所有的积极的印象。

This year the TV show San Shi Er Yi (Merely Thirty) has caused a stir in China. Its success has largely been attributed to its resonating deeply with the anxiety of women facing multiple pressures in modern times, Zeng says.

曾向敏表示,今年电视剧《三十而已》在中国获得巨大成功。它的成功很大程度上得益于深入地挖掘了现代女性面临各种压力后产生的焦虑,在受众中产生了共鸣。

But with the rising awareness of independence and economic confidence among women in China, some have chosen to ignore others' expectations and instead stick to their academic or occupational development.

随着中国越来越多的女性独立意识以及经济自信增强,许多女性开始忽略其他人的期待,而是坚持追求学术或者职业的成功与发展。

Many Chinese regard 30 as a deadline for women to give birth, so many feel intense pressure to marry. [Photo provided to China Daily]

很多中国人认为30岁就要结婚生子,很多女性感受到了婚姻的压力。(图片来自于每日中国)

Jean Zhou, 32, founder of a film and television company in Beijing, says she rarely thinks about marriage because most of the time she is simply too busy with work.

周琼,32岁,一家北京电影电视公司创始人,表示很少思考婚姻的事,一直忙着工作几乎没有时间思考。

Zhou started her own business in 2018 after having worked as an executive in a finance company. When she quit she had acquired enough knowledge and built up networks to the extent that she felt well prepared for entrepreneurship, she says.

周琼在一家金融公司当高管,并于2018年开始建立自己的公司。她在工作中获得了足够的技能,建立了商业人际关系,她感觉自己已经准备好了就辞职了。

She now works 14 hours a day, she says, talking with investors, expanding business and managing 10 employees. Shooting of several TV operas that her company is producing will begin next year, she says.

她现在每天工作14小时,每天见投资人,商业扩张,管理10个员工。明年她的公司将有几个电视剧开拍。

The age of 30 is not a marker that should define what a person should or should not do with one's life, but rather "an optimal time to do things I couldn't do when I was in my 20s". As successful as Zhou has been, she says she feels she can make even greater career achievements when she is in her 40s.

30岁的生活并不是一个能够定义一个人一生能做什么、不能做什么,而是一个最优的时间,去做一件我20岁时候做不了的时间。周琼已经获得了巨大的商业成功,她对未来充满期待,她说感觉在40岁之际将创造更大的商业成功。

From time to time her parents or other older relatives urge her to find someone to marry, she says.

她表示,不时父母亲或其他亲戚还是会催促她早个人结婚。

"They are well-intentioned, but it takes time to establish trust and spot the right person. Not only that, but a failed marriage and divorce could be a real pain.

"父母、亲戚都是好意,不过,找到一个合适的人建立信任相知的关系需要花费时间。不仅如此,失败的婚姻、离婚会给人带来巨大的悲痛。”

"Sometimes I think I would be happier if there was someone who gave me companionship, but then again if you get the wrong person it may just mess things up."

“有时我想如果有个人陪伴我,我将更加幸福。不过然后又想想,如果身边是一个错误的人,将让一切变得更加糟糕。”

China's divorce rate rose from 0.55 percent in 1987 to 1.85 percent in 2009 and to 3.2 percent in 2018. Last year 9.47 million couples married, compared with 12.41 million in 2010. About 4.15 million divorces were registered last year, compared with 2.68 million in 2010, the Ministry of Civil Affairs says.

人社部数据表示,中国的离婚率从1987年的0.55%变为2009年的1.85%,再到2018年的3.2%。去年947万夫妻结婚,2010年当年结婚的人数有1241万。去年离婚家庭有大约415万,相比较而言,2010年数据是268万。

Zhou says she eventually hopes to find the man who is worth spending the rest of her life with and thinks of having a child one day, but she will not set a timetable.

周琼表示她还是希望最终找到一个合适的人共度余生,结婚生子,不过她不会设定一个结婚的时间表。

"As technology advances, women can also give birth to healthy babies at 40 and above."

“随着科技发展,女性40或者更大年率生成健康的宝宝也是可以的。”

Ivy Ouyang, 33, who began studying for an MBA degree in New York last year, says she thinks that instead of being unmarried, "lack of life experience overseas is a greater pity in these modern times".

欧阳艾维,33岁,去年在纽约学习MBA课程。她表示,“在现代,缺乏海外生活经历比没有结婚是更大的遗憾。”

She came up with the idea of studying overseas in 2013, she says, when she felt she was in a career rut. She was a finance journalist who interviewed a lot of high-flyers in various industries and was inspired by their openness of mind and their abilities in cross-cultural communication.

她2013年萌生了海外出国留学的想法。她是一个金融记者,采访过很多各行各业的大咖,采访受众拥有开放的思维以及跨文化沟通的能力,让她深受激励。她感到自己的职业一成不变。

Her parents were at first doubtful about the idea of her studying overseas but she managed to turn them around to her way of thinking.

父母首先对这种海报留学的想法表示怀疑,不过她都成功地把父母的想法改变了。

"It would be harder to return to university studies once I married and had children," she says, adding that of her 800 classmates, half are single and many are above 30.

“等我结婚并有孩子后,回到大学学习将变得更加困难。我们有800个同学,一半是单身,许多都是30多岁。”

She is due to graduate next year, she says, and her studies have proved to be a highly enriching experience in which she has had the good fortune to be taught by Nobel Prize laureates or top-level executives, to visit top companies and attend lectures given by global leaders and make friends with people from many walks of life. She likes mixing with people on campus, where there are no ulterior motives, such as money, and she feels younger living in a new environment, she says.

她将明年毕业。海外学习让她拥有丰富的经历,能够足够好运,得到诺贝尔奖得主的或高水平的管理者的授课,参观顶级企业,参与全球领导者的演讲,与各界的人做朋友。她喜欢在校园里与人交往,在这里并没有赚钱的商业目的,生活在新校园新环境让她感觉更年轻了。

"Apart from that, it seems fewer people care about age."

“除此之外,似乎很少有人关心年龄。”

The two-year study will cost about $160,000. Renting an apartment outside the school costs $3,000 to $4,000 a month. While she has enough money saved to be able to live, her parents pay half of her expenses, she says.

两年的海外学习将花费160000美元。在校外租房子每月花费3000-4000美元。她存了生活费,她的父母支付了一年的费用。

On her 30th birthday she traveled to Africa with her best friend and says she did not feel anxious or like a different person after reaching that milestone.

30岁生日,她与最好的朋友到非洲旅游。到达三十岁这个里程碑年龄,她并不感到焦虑或者像一个不同的人。

Growing up should come in the form of "step-by-step progress" so that one knows what kind of life one wants, she says.

成长应该是一步一步的过程,这样每个人才能知道自己想要怎样的生活。

Many women in China race into marriage under pressure without sufficient thought or research and end up with quarrels, family violence, divorce and even being killed, she says. The term "leftover women", a stigmatic term for unmarried women in China, is inaccurate, she says.

”很多女性因为压力进入婚姻,却没有深入思考或研究,结果导致婚后陷入争吵、家庭暴力、离婚或者甚至被谋杀的境地。‘剩女’这个词,对于中国未婚女性的一个耻辱的标签,并不准确。”

"We are not unwanted, but a little picky," she laughs.

“我们并不是被剩下的,而是有些挑剔。”

Speaking of an ideal life, she foresees a supportive husband, one or two children and a job in which she can realize her self-worth.

谈及一种理想的生活,她期待有一个支持的丈夫,一两个小孩,能够实现自身价值的工作。

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