最近，Reddit上的一篇帖子引起了英国《每日邮报》的注意：
Wedding photographers of Reddit: can you tell if a couple is going to last or not? If so, how?
Reddit上的婚礼摄影师们，你可以判断一对夫妻将来是和还是离吗？如果可以，怎么判断？
没想到这个帖子炸出来了一堆的老司机，
大部分的回答都是：yes！
小编为大家整理出了这些你不知道的十一个小细节：
1. 眼神
没错，俗话说”眼睛是心灵的窗户“。判断一对夫妻是否相信、深爱对方，看眼神就知道啦。
I have an album of photos of my now ex-husband glaring at me. It'd be difficult for the photographer to have not noticed.
我的前夫在照片里都是瞪着我的。我想摄影师不难发现吧。
Not a professional photo, but at my parents' wedding, I think you can already see my mother beginning to have doubts.
我不是专业的摄影师，不过在我父母的婚礼上，我想你们都可以看出来我妈妈瞪着那双充满怀疑的大眼睛。
对面相颇感兴趣的小编对这点举双手赞成，其实相面最直接的办法就是看眼神呐，一个人各种性格和想法啊都透过眼神展现无遗······
2. 切蛋糕的姿势
看到这儿小编真的惊呆了，切蛋糕的姿势不对竟然也预示着离婚？！
This is going to sound totally cheesy but I feel even more strongly about this: what happens during the cake cutting. Sweetly feeding one another? Good sign. A playful smear of icing on the nose? No problem.
这个听起来很幼稚，不过我真的很相信这点：切蛋糕时夫妻双方的表现预示着婚姻的好坏。如果他们很甜蜜地喂对方蛋糕，以后婚姻没问题。开玩笑地往对方鼻子上抹蛋糕，完了。
还好，中国的婚礼仪式上没有切蛋糕这个部分，嘿嘿！
3. 拍照时的反应
I was told by our photographer - "If the man looks for the woman on how to position themselves rather than the person taking the pictures, there's going to be a shitstorm"
一个摄影师曾经告诉我：“如果男的在照相时更在乎他们拍照的姿势，而不是他和谁照相，暴风雨就要来啦······”
I had my friend whose been a wedding photographer for ten years with me to show me the ropes after doing a lot of second shooting with him.
我的一个朋友有十年的婚礼拍摄经验，他告诉我可以从哪些细节去判断。
So he poses a kissing shot of the couple, and when he asks them to kiss the bride goes "oh, no, no thank you" in this weird little mousey voice.
有次他想拍新人互相接吻的照片，当他叫他们亲吻对方时，新娘突然吱吱呜呜地说：”不要这样，谢谢。“
He has shot over a 100 weddings and said he never saw a couple so not into each other as much as they were.
他已经拍摄过上百场的婚礼了，这是他第一次遇到这样的情况。
4. 婚礼的致辞
What people who give speeches (maid of honor, best man, father of the bride) say about the person their friend/relative is marrying is a huge giveaway. Do they feel like this person enriches their new spouse's life? Do they see them as an extension of their family or as a close friend? Or are they simply "happy for them"?
给婚礼致辞的人（伴娘，伴郎或者新娘父亲）对新人说的话包含了大量的信息。他们是否认为新成员让对方的生活更加圆满？他们是否把新成员当成家人或好友？或者他们真的为新人感到高兴？
I've heard some truly heartfelt, touching words shared during toasts... and have heard others that were seriously underwhelming. If it isn't easy for you to think of why this person is a good match for your friend, that's a bad sign.
我在他们互相敬酒时听到过太多发自肺腑，感人至深的话语。如果你不确定这个人是否和你的朋友相配，这就是一个危险的信号。
In the Bride and Groom speeches, if they don't mention the other person, it's probably not a good sign. It reminds of when a director wins best picture and doesn't acknowledge the lead actor or vice versa.
如果一对新人在发表结婚感言时没有提到其他的人，这也不是一个好信号。就像导演获奖时没有提到主角和配角。
Not a photographer (nor do I play one on TV) but I've been to a bunch of weddings. One that gave off alarm bells was a female friend's wedding - and when the best man (groom's brother) gave the speech, he didn't mention the bride ONCE. WTF. It wasn't off the cuff remarks and he forgot, it was a prepared, moderately long speech. No shocker here: divorced in 2 years...
我不是摄影师，但是我参加过很多次婚礼。这个事情给我敲响了警钟，在一个朋友的婚礼上，当伴郎致辞时，他完全没有提到新娘。天哪。他不是因为即兴讲话而忘了，他提前就准备好了一段长短适宜的演讲。所以后来我一点也不吃惊：朋友已经离婚两年了。
5. 亲朋好友的反应
the differences we see in the families' and friends' behavior at a wedding - the bridesmaids talking, the groomsmen interacting, the parents' glances and body language, the frigging toasts - all are very telling about how much they think this is a good idea and how much community support there is around a couple.
亲朋好友在婚礼上的各种反应很能说明问题。双方父母无意中的一瞥，肢体语言，祝酒词，都能说明他们愿意给新人多大的支持。
Wedding photographer here, I probably have done more than a 150 wedding so far and most of the time yes I can tell if a couple is going to last or not. You can tell by the kind of people they are and by whom they are surrounded.
I admit, I tear up a bit during a great ceremony when the vows are real ( meaning personalised ) and filled with love. Then there those couples where they're constantly nagging at each other about stupid things, not to forget the groom hitting on the photographer (I'm a female photographer).
婚礼摄像师在此，我目前已经拍过150场婚礼了。很多时候我都可以判断一对新人以后是好是坏。你可以根据他们周围的人来判断。
我承认，有场婚礼的结婚誓词非常的真挚，包含着浓浓的爱意，我都感动得哭了。但是很多人不停地唠叨一些傻事，一直揪着新郎打摄影师的事不放（我是一名女摄影师）。
6. 新人认识时间太短
I've been shooting weddings for 4 years, at a rate of 12-15 a year. I've only known of one to be divorced, and in hindsight, their divorce doesn't surprise me. They only dated for a few months before they got engaged and got married even before their 1 year anniversary.
我拍婚礼四年了，每年平均12~15场。其中我知道的有一对离婚了，但是我一点也不觉得奇怪。他们只交往了几个月，订婚时都还不满一年。
7. 对婚礼和婚姻的想法
Many couples, particularly young couples, pretty clearly have in mind a wedding but have put little thought and planning into a marriage.
许多夫妻，特别是很多年轻的夫妇，对于婚礼有很清晰的想法，但是对于婚姻却没有什么规划。
A few things I have also noticed is some brides are almost more in love with the idea of a wedding rather then the person they are marrying. I shot one wedding where the girl had 4 different dresses for the entire day, elaborate jewelry and everything was over the top, but this was no interaction between the bride and groom at this wedding.
我注意到，有的新娘更关注婚礼而不是她要嫁的那个人。我记得有场婚礼，新娘一天就准备了四套不同的服装，首饰非常精致，一切都很完美，但是新郎和新娘在婚礼上却没有任何互动。
Not a photographer, but hairstylist. One wedding I did I could tell it wasn't going to last. She was young, couldn't even drink yet, he was at least ten years older. They were getting married because her family was very religious and I got the impression that they chose him and thought she should marry him more than she wanted to marry him, she liked the idea of a wedding (and moving out of her parents place) more than she was in love. A year later it was over but she was so much better off. She'd grown so much and had moved out on her own and had become a grown up. I was really happy for her.
我不是婚礼摄影师，而是发型师。有一场婚礼我可以确定那对新人不会长久。新娘很年轻，甚至不能喝酒，新郎则比她大10岁。但是他们最后结婚了，因为新娘的家人很传统，他们认为她应该嫁给她而不考虑她想不想嫁给他。而新娘呢，她对婚礼本身更感兴趣。一年以后， 他们离婚了，但是她解脱了。她成熟了很多，自己离开了那儿。我真心为她感到高兴。
8. 新人婚礼分头行动
I've taken my share of wedding pictures. When the bride and groom spend the whole reception apart, or you can't tear the groom out of the bar, or away from whatever sports game is on, it generally does not work out well.
我来分享一下我的拍摄经历吧。如果新娘和新郎在接待时一直都是分开的，或者你一直都不能把新郎从酒吧、各种游戏中拉出来，结果通常都不会好。
9. 自私急躁新娘VS懒惰不成熟新郎
If I had to pick a trend, it would be really self centered brides (or quick tempered ones) or lazy/immature grooms. Really bad combination if both of them are that way.
我发现有这样一个规律，如果新娘很自私（或者很急躁）或者新郎很懒，不成熟。这样的组合绝对不会有一个好结果。
10. 新娘强势、专横、喜欢指手画脚，轻视对方
I've worked for a portrait photographer in Myrtle Beach for the past eight years. The biggest sign for me is how bossy the bride is to the groom. If she's totally running the show to the point where he is getting a little annoyed, that's a huge sign.
我在美尔特沙滩拍照八年了。对于我来说，最大的危险信号就是新娘太爱指手画脚了。如果程度过了，新郎开始有点厌烦，那就是一个巨大的信号。
Not a wedding photographer, but I planned events (mostly weddings) for several years. The number one I would say is contempt. If either of the couple has contempt for the other (not respecting their opinion, minimizing their thoughts, puts down their partner, etc) I guarantee the couple will divorce.
我不是婚礼摄影师，但是我策划婚礼很多年了。我想说的是轻视、蔑视对方。如果新人中的一方轻视对方（比如不尊重对方的观点，极力压缩对方的想法，压制、贬低对方），我就可以静静地看他们离婚。
下面小编要介绍的最后一个小细节
有点让人不知所措，
甚至细思极恐！
11. 婚礼摄影师自带加持或破坏，甚至毁灭属性
有的婚礼摄影师自带光环，只要facebook和他关注的夫妻，至今都幸福美满，比如下面这位：
Wedding photog here. I often become Facebook friends with some of the clients, but not always. None have gotten divorced that I'm friends with. But the large percentage that I'm not friends with I have no idea about
婚礼摄影师在此。我经常和一些客户在facebook上互相关注，成为好友。只要和我关注了的都没有离婚。至于那些没关注的我就不确定了。
而有的摄影师就自带破坏属性：
My dad did wedding photography as a side project, and of the 27 couples he did over the course of 4 years, at least 20 have divorced.
tl;dr: Don't hire my dad unless you know a good divorce lawyer.
我爸把婚礼拍摄作为副业，在他过去四年里拍摄的27对新人中，至少有20个都离婚了。
温馨提示：千万别找我爸拍婚礼，除非你知道一个很厉害的打离婚官司的律师。
I did weddings for several years after I graduated from college in the 70's. Of all the weddings I remember photographing none of them are still together today. One of them lasted 30 years, declared their marriage a success, divorced, and both went on to try it again with other people.
70年代毕业后，我就一直在做婚礼摄影。我拍摄过的夫妻现在都离了。其中一对的婚姻维持了30年，他们声称他们的婚姻是成功的，结果最后还是离了，然后又开始寻找另一半。
不过最恐怖的当属下面这位，别人拍照是要钱，他拍照是要钱又要命
My dad has a problem a bit like this but worse. He is a video producer, and he usually makes report videos for city halls and mayors. So far, 4 of the mayors he has worked with have died in car crashes or other kind of accidents. So that's that.
我爸爸的情况更糟。他为市政大厅和市长做过很多报道视频。其中四个他工作的市长要么死于车祸，要么就死于其他事故。。。
其实，这些摄影老司机有如此强大的第六感一点也不奇怪，正如其中一个老司机所说：
We spend 8, 10, 12 or more hours in a day looking at the bride and groom through a frame that isolates them alone and together, largely stripping away the broader context and focusing on their interactions. We are looking specifically for moments of contact, of intimacy, of emotional connection. It pretty quickly becomes evident when those things are there, and when they are not.
我们一天花8,10,12甚至更长的时间从镜头里注视着新娘和新郎，这样就更能注意到他们之间的反应，特别是他们之间的举动。这些很快就成了判断的线索。
其实，这些小细节所反应的是
夫妻双方对婚姻是否有成熟的想法，
是否尊重对方，
是否相信对方，
是否真正关心对方，
当然，也看命运的安排，
如果遇到了一个
自带婚姻拆离属性的摄影师，
那就只能说：
一切都是命呀！
