Monica:What you guys don`t understand is for us,kissing is as important as any part of it.

[你们男生不理解，对女生来说，接吻和其他部分一样重要。]

Joey:Yeah,right.You serious?

[是了吧。真的吗？]

（乔伊刚听到莫妮卡说时笑着应了一句对，是呀。当他发现她们用奇怪的眼神看着他时，他才发觉女生的话不是在开玩笑。）

Phoebe:Oh,yaeh.

[噢，是的]

Rachel:Everything you need to know is in that first kiss.

[你可以从第一个吻中得知一切你想知道的]

Monica:Absolutely.[没错]

Chandler:Yeah,I think,for us kissing is pretty much like an opening act.I mean,It`s like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through before Pink Floyd comes out.

[好吧，我觉得，对于我们男生而言，接吻就像是一个出场秀。我的意思是，就像你得忍受搞笑艺人的那一段，才能等到Pink Floyd登场]

Ross:Yeah,and it`s not we don`t like the comwdian,it`s just that that`s not why we bought the ticket.

[是的，我们并不是不喜欢喜剧表演，只是我们买票不是为了看这个。]

Chandler:See,the problem is,though after the concert`s over,no matter how great the show was you girls are always looking for the comedian again.I mean,we`re in the car,we`re fighting traffic basically just trying to stay awake.

[听着，问题是，无论演唱会有多么精彩，你们女生总在结束后想再看一次喜剧表演。我是说我们在车里，对抗堵车，努力保持清醒。]

Rachel:Yeah,well,word of advice:Bring back the comedian.Otherwise,you`re gonna find youself sitting at home listening to that album alone.

[是了，好吧，接受我的建议：把喜剧表演找回来。否则，你会发现你自己独自一人坐在家中听录音带。]

（众人讨论时，乔伊一脸懵逼，因为他们在谈论时都用了隐喻，乔伊这个马大哈当然听不懂。毕竟乔伊的人设是：四肢发达头脑简单型的花花公子。历经女友无数但从未有过刻骨铭心的爱情。意大利裔美国人，没有受过很高的教育。尽管对男女之事甚是敏感，在其他各方面都显现出别人所缺少的童心。总是会错意，老说大白话。）

Joey:Are we still talking about sex?

[我们还在谈论性吗？]

【史前博物馆，罗斯在和工作人员玛莎对话。】

Ross:No,it`s good,it is good,it`s just that ..Mm…doesn`t she seem a littleangry?

【不，挺好的，只是。嗯，不过你不觉得她看起来有一点生气吗？】

Marsha:Well,she hasissues.

【那是因为她有问题了。】

Ross:Does she?

【她有吗？】

Marsha:He`s outbanging other women over the head with a club.While she sits at home trying toget the mastodon smell out of the carpet!

【她的男人在外面拿着大棒敲昏别的女人，而她却得在家努力清除地毯上乳齿象的气味。】

Ross:Marsha,theseare cave people,okay?They have issues like”Gee,that glacier`s getting kind of close.”See?

【玛莎，他们是原始人，好吗？他们关心的问题应该是“嘿，冰川时代里我们越来越近了。”懂吗？】

Marsha:Speaking ofissues,isn`t that your ex-wife?

【说到问题，那个不是你的前妻吗？】

（此时，玛莎看到在隔离窗户外的卡罗尔）

Ross:Me?no.

【我的？不是。】

Marsha:Yes,itis.Carol!Hi!

【是的，就是她。卡罗尔，你好！】

Ross:Okay,yes,yes,itis.How about I ll catch up with you in the Ice Age?

【好吧，是是，她是。那么我们一会在冰河世纪那里见好吗？】

Ross:Hi!

Carol:Hi!

Ross:You look great.I,uh,Ihate that.

【你气色很好，我，我讨厌这样。】

（当时罗斯依旧爱着他的前妻，所以才会说不喜欢卡罗尔气色好。她跟别人过得很好他心里不舒服。可能罗斯希望这个世界上只有他能令她幸福吧。）

Carol:Sorry,thanks,youlook good too.

【对不起，谢谢你，你看起来也很好。】

Ross:Ah,well,inhere,anyone who…stands erect…So,what`s new?Still,uh…

【额，好吧，在这儿任何直立…最近怎么样？还是，额…】

Carol:A lesbian?

【女同性恋？】

Ross:Well…You neverknow.How`s,um…How`s the family?

【好吧，世事难料。家庭生活如何？】

Carol:Marty`s still totally paranoid.Oh,and,uh…

【Marty的疑心还是很重。】

（此时，很显然卡罗尔有话说，但又不敢说。她假装拿起地上的一根树枝。）

Ross：Why…why are you here,Carol?

【卡罗尔，你为什么来这儿？】

Carol:I`m pregnant.

【我怀孕了。】

（罗斯做出了一个和旁边的原始人一模一样的动作。）

Ross:Pregnant?

【怀孕了？】

（显然罗斯很吃惊，他们已经离婚。他老婆是同性恋。本以为就此终结，没想到一不小心，离婚前就有孩子了。）

TV：She didn`t leave in such a hurry after all.

Chandler:Oh,I think this is the episode of Three`s Company where there`s some king of misunderstanding.

Phoebe:Then I`ve already seen this one!

Monica:Are you through with that?

Joey:Yeah,sorry.the swallowing slowed me down.

Monica:Whose little ball of paper is this?

Chandler:Oh,uh,that would be mine.See,I wrote a note to myself,and then I realized I didn`t need it,so I balled it up,now I wish I was dead.

Phoebe:She`s already flutted that pillow.Monica,you know,you`re already fluffed that,but it`s fine!

Monica:Look,i`msorry,guys,I just don`t wanna give them any more ammunition than they already have.

Chandler:Yes,and we all know how cruel a parents can be about the flatness of a child`s pillow.

Phoebe:Monica?Hi!um,Monica,you are scaring me.I mean,you`re like,you are like all chaotic and twirly and not,not in a good way.

Joey:Yeah,calm down.You didn`t see Ross getting all chaotic and twirly every time they come.

Monica:That`s because as far as my parents are concerned,Ross can do not wrong. You see,he's"The Prince".Apparently they had some big ceremony before I was born.

Chandler:Ew,ew,ew.

Monica:What?

Chandler: Ugly Naked Guy got a Thigh-Master.

All:Ew

Rachel:Has anybodyseen my engagement ring?

Phoebe:Yeah,It'sbeautiful.

Rachel:Oh,God!Oh,God! Oh,God!

Phoebe:No,look,don'ttouch that.

Rachel:Oh,Like I wasn't dreading tomorrow enough,having to give it back."Hi,Barry,remember me? I'm the girl in the veil who stomped on your heart in front of your entire family”.Without the ring,which makes it so much harder.

Monica:Easy,Rach,we'll find it. Won't we?

Chandler：OH，yeah.

Monica:Okay,look.

Joey:Alright,When do you have it on  last?

Phoebe:Doy,Probably right before she lost it.

Chandler:You don't get a lot of "doy" these days.

Rachel:I know I had it this morning. and I know I had it when I was in the kitchen with...

Chandler:Dinah?

Rachel: Oh,don't be mad.

Monica:You didn't.

Rachel: Oh,I'm sorry.

Monica:I gave you one job!

Rachel:Oh, but look how straight those noodles are.

Chandler:Now,Monica,you know that's not how you look for an engagement ring in a lasagna.

Monica:I just can't do it.

Chandler:Boys?We're going in.

Ross:Hi.

Monica:That is not a happy "hi."

Ross: Carol's pregnant.

Phoebe:Ooh,I found it!

Monica:What?w w wWhat?

Ross:Yeah. Do that for another two hours,you might be where I am right about now.

Chandler:Kinda puts that whole pillow thing in perspective.Huh,Mon?

Monica:Wellnow,how,How do you fit into this whole thing?

Ross:Well,Carol says she and Susan want me to be involved. But if I'm not comfortable with it,I don't have to be involved. It's totally up to me.

Phoebe:She is so great. I miss her.

Monica:What does she mean by "involved"?

Chandler:Imean.Presumably,the biggest part of your job is done.

Ross:Anyway,they want me to go down to this sonogram thing, with them tomorrow.

Rachel: So what are you gonna do?

Ross: I have no idea. No matter what I do,though, I'm still gonna be a father.

Joey:Well,this is still ruined,right?

MM:Oh,Martha Ludwin`s daughter is gonna call you.Mmm!What`s that curry taste?

Monica:Curry.

Ross:I，I think they`re great! I really do.

DD:Do you remember the Ludwins?The big one had a thing for you,didn`t she?

MM:They all had a thing for him.

Ross：Aw,Mom

Monica:I`m sorry,why is this girl going to call me?

MM:Oh,she just graduated,and she wants to be

something in cooking,or food,or…I don`t know.Anyway,I told her you had a restaurant.

Monica:No,Mom,I don`t have a restaurant,I work in a restaurant.

Mm:Well,they don`t have to know that.

Monica:Ross,could you come and help me with the spaghetti,please?

Ross：Yeah.

莫妮卡正在厨房里弄意大利面，妈妈却在客厅检查靠枕是否已经被拍松。第三幕中，当莫妮卡在紧张收拾的时候，钱德勒调侃到“众所周知，父母对孩子的枕头能有多挑剔”。事实上，莫妮卡的妈妈就是如此的挑剔。

老友记第一季第二集第3幕

MM:Oh,we`re having spaghetti!That`s easy.

Monica:I know this is to sound unbelievably selfish on my part,but you planning on bringing up the whole

baby\lesbian thing?Because I think it might take some of the heat off me.

Mm:What that Rachel did to her life? We ran into her parents at the club.They were not playing very well.

Dd:I`m not gonna tell you what they spent on that wedding,but $40,000 is a lot of money.

Mm:Well,at least she had the chance to leave a man at the altar.

Monica:What`s that supposed to mean?

MM:Nothing.it`s an expression.

Monica:No,it`s not.

Dd:Don`t listen to your mother.You`re independent and you always have been.Even when you were a kid,and you were chubby,and you had no friends you were just fine.You`d read alone in your room.And your puzzles.Look, there are people,like Ross,who need to shoot for the stars.

With his museum and his papers getting published.Other people are satisfied with staying where they are.I`m telling you,these are the people who never get cancer.And I read about these women trying to have it all,and I thank God our little Harmonica doesn`t seem to have that problem.

Monica:So,Ross,What`s going on with you?Any stories?No news?no little anecdotes to share with the folks？

Ross:Okay,okay.Ahem,look,I,uh,I realize you guys have been wondering what exactly happened between Carol and me.And so,well,here`s the deal.Carol is a lesbian.She`s living with a women named Susan.She`s pregnant with my child.And she and Susan going to raise the baby.

罗斯跟父母说这么多的事实与实话，我觉得莫妮卡和罗斯都已经准备好要听另一种唠叨了，结果万万没想到他妈就说了这么一句话，把“矛头”又指向了莫妮卡。

MM:And you knew about this?

莫妮卡让罗斯跟父母讲女同性恋，孩子啥的，目的让父母转移对莫妮卡的“挑剔”，结果令人无奈的是，他们的父母根本不在意罗斯的这些“错误”。

Joey: Your folks are really that bad, huh?

Ross: Well, y'know, these people are pros. They know what they're doing, they take their time, they get the job done.

无论发生什么事，他父母最后都能把问题绕到莫妮卡身上

Monica: Boy, I know they say you can't change your parents,... boy, if

you could- (To Ross) -I'd want yours.

莫妮卡开玩笑的对罗斯说：“如果可以我想要你的父母”（他们本就是兄妹）

Ross: Must pee.

Phoebe: Y'know, it's even worse when you're twins.

Rachel: You're twins?

Phoebe: Yeah. We don't speak. She's like this high-powered, driven career type .

Chandler: What does she do?

Phoebe: She's a waitress.

此处是一个搞笑的地方哟，菲比说她的双胞胎姐姐是一个工作狂，当钱德勒问她姐姐是做什么的时候，菲比说是服务生。同样是服务生，瑞秋可是非常清闲呐！！！

Rachel: All right, you guys, I kinda gotta clean up now.

Monica: Chandler, you're an only child, right? You don't have any of this.

Chandler: Well, no, although I did have an imaginary friend, who... my parents actually preferred.

Rachel: The lights, please..

Ross: ...How long was I in there?

罗斯只是上个厕所的功夫，原本热闹的咖啡馆内只剩下做打扫的瑞秋了，所以有此一问——我到底在里面待了多久？？？

Rachel: I'm just cleaning up.

Ross: D'ya.. uh.. d'ya need any help?

Rachel: Uh.. okay, sure! Thanks.

Ross: Anyway.. um..  So, you- uh- you nervous about Barry tomorrow?

Rachel: Oh.. a little..

Ross: Mm-hmm..

Rachel: A lot.

Ross: Mm.

Rachel: So, got any advice? Y'know, as someone who's recently been dumped?

Ross: Well, you may wanna steer clear of the word 'dumped'. Chances are he's gonna be this, this broken shell of a man , y'know,so you should try not to look too terrific, I know it'll be hard. Or, y'know, uh, hey!, I'll go down there, and I'll give Barry back his ring, and you can go with Carol and Susan to the OB/GYN...

Rachel: Oh, you've got Carol tomorrow.. When did it get so complicated?

Ross: Got me 这你可把我问倒了.

Rachel: Remember when we were in high school together?

Ross: Yeah.

Rachel: I mean, didn't you think you were just gonna meet somone, fall in love  and that'd be it? Ross?

Ross: Yes, yes!

Rachel: Oh! Man, I never thought I'd be here..

Ross: Me either...

（罗斯进来卡罗尔产检的房间）

Ross: (entering) Sorry I'm late, I was stuck at work. There was this big

dinosaur.. thing.. anyway.

(这时Susan也进来了，手里拿着一瓶饮料)

Susan: Hi.

Carol: Ross, you remember Susan.

Ross: How could I forget?

（罗斯怎么可能会忘记呢？苏珊可是拐了他老婆的女人。）

Susan: Ross.

Ross: (罗斯和苏珊握手) Hello, Susan. (罗斯对着卡罗尔说道) Good shake,Good shake（力道很大）. So, uh, we're just waiting for...?

Carol: Dr. Oberman.

Ross: ..Dr. Oberman. Okay. And is he.

Susan: She.

Ross: -she, of course, she- uh- familiar with our.. special situation?

Carol: Yes, and she's very supportive.

Ross: Okay, that's great. (Susan想把饮料递给卡罗尔，罗斯以为要给他，便拒绝) No, I'm- Oh.

Carol: Thanks.

Ross: (罗斯拿起将要打开卡罗尔子宫颈的工具在玩，还学鸭子叫) Quack,

quack..

Carol: Ross? That opens my cervix.

Rachel: Barry?

Barry: C'mon in.

Rachel: Are you sure?

Barry: Yeah! It's fine, it's fine. Robbie's gonna be here for hours.

Robbie: Huh?!

（听到自己还要在这儿待好几个小时，Robbie感到很惊讶。）

Barry: So, how you doing?

Rachel: I'm- uh- I'm okay... You look great!

Barry: Yeah, well..

Bernice: (over intercom) Dr. Farber, Jason Greenstein's gagging.

Barry: (answering the intercom) Be right there. （对瑞秋和Robbie说）Be back in a sec.

Rachel: I dumped him.

（瑞秋看到Robbie很疑惑的看着自己，便对他说，是我甩了巴瑞）

Robbie: Okay.（满不在乎的说，好吧，我知道了）

Ross: So, um- so how's this, uh, how's this gonna work ? Y'know, with us? Y'know, when, like, important decisions have to

be made?

Carol: Give me a 'for instance'.

Ross: Well, uh, uh, I don't know, okay, okay, how about with the, uh, with the baby's name?

Carol: Marlon.

Ross: Marlon?!

Carol: -if it's a boy, Minnie if it's a girl.

Ross: ...As in Mouse?

Carol: As in my grandmother.

Ross: Still, you- you say Minnie, you hear Mouse. Um, how about, um.. how about Julia?

Carol: Julia..

Susan: We agreed on Minnie.

（苏珊说我们商量好了，就叫Minnie,这时罗斯说很搞笑耶，我和卡罗尔曾经还说好了要一辈子在一起，还不是变了?）

Ross: 'S'funny, um, uh, we agreed we'd spend the rest of our lives together.Things change, roll with the punches. I believe Julia's on the table?

Barry: Sorry about that. So. What have you been up to?

Rachel: Oh, not much 混的过去. I-I got a job.

Barry: Oh, that's great.

Rachel: Why are- why are you so tanned?

Barry: Oh, I, uh- I went to Aruba.

Rachel: Oh no. You went on our honeymoon alone?

Barry: No. I went with, uh.. Now, this may hurt.

（那可能会有点痛哟）

Robbie: Me?! （我吗？）

Barry: No! (To Rachel) I went with Mindy.

Rachel: Mindy?! My maid of honour Mindy?!

Barry: Yeah, well, uh, we're kind of a thing now.

Rachel: Oh! Well, um..  You've got plugs!

Barry: Careful! They haven't quite taken yet.

Rachel: And you've got lenses! But you hate sticking your finger in your

eye!

Barry: Not for her. Listen, I really wanted to thank you.

Rachel: Okay..

Barry: See, about a month ago, I wanted to hurt you. More than I've ever wanted to hurt anyone in my life. And I'm an orthodontist.

Rachel: Wow.

Barry: You know, you were right? I mean, I thought we were happy. We weren't happy. But with Mindy, now I'm happy. Spit.

Rachel: What?

Robbie: Me.

Rachel:Anyway,um,I guess this belongs to you. And thank you for giving it to me.

Barry: Well, thank you for giving it back.

(Barry 和Rachel 看着彼此，忘了还在等待的Robbie)

Robbie: Hello?

Susan: Oh, please! What's wrong with Helen?

Ross: Helen Geller? I don't think so.

Carol: Hello? It's not gonna be Helen Geller.

Ross: Thank you!

Carol: No,I mean it's not Geller.

Ross: What, it's gonna be Helen Willick?

Carol: No, actually, um, we talked about Helen Willick-Bunch.

Ross: Well, wait a minute, wha- why is she in the title 为什么她也有份?

Susan: It's my baby too.

Ross: Oh, 's'funny, really? Um, I don't remember you making any sperm.

Susan: Yeah, and we all know what a challenge that is!

Carol: All right, you two, stop it!

Ross: No no no, she gets a credit, hey, I'm in there too.

Carol: Ross. You're not actually suggesting Helen Willick-Bunch-Geller? 'Cause I think that borders on child abuse.

Ross: Of course not, I'm... suggesting Geller-Willick-Bunch.

Susan: Oh, no, nonononono, you see what he's doing? He knows no-one's gonna say all those names, so they'll wind up calling her Geller, then he gets his way!

Ross:Myway?!You you think this is my way? Believe me, of all the ways

I ever imagined this moment in my life being, this is not my way- y'know what? Uh, um, this is too hard. I'm not, I can't do.

Dr. Oberman: (entering) Knock knock!How are we today? Any nausea?

All: Yeah. Yeah. A little.

Dr. Oberman: Well, I was just wondering about the mother-to-be,but.. thanks for sharing. (To Carol) Uh, lie back..

Ross: You- uh- y'know what, I'm gonna go. I don't- I don't think I can

be involved in this particular thing right now. (罗斯说他待不下去了，因为这三个人难以对起名的问题有一致的看法。但是，罗斯刚要离开时，就听到了超声波，这是三个人间的矛盾顿时没了，三个人的手紧紧握在一起。感动啊)

Ross: Oh my God.

Susan: Look at that.

Carol: I know.

（回到莫妮卡家中，罗斯把超声波录像放给大伙看）

Ross: Well? Isn't that amazing?

Joey: What are we supposed to be seeing here? （我应该看到啥呀？）

Chandler: I don 't know, but.. I think it's about to attack the Enterprise.

Phoebe: You know, if you tilt your head to the left, and relax your eyes, it kinda looks like an old potato.

Ross: Then don't do that, alright?

Phoebe: Okay!

Ross: (walks over to where Monica is standing)Monica. What do you think?

Monica: (welling up) Mm-hmm.

Ross: Wh- are you welling up?

Monica: No.

Ross: You are, you're welling up?

Monica: I am not! （此时莫妮卡热泪盈眶，因为她就要当姑姑啦！）

Ross: You're gonna be an aunt.

Monica: (pushes him and starts to cry) Oh shut up!

Rachel: (on phone) Hi, Mindy. Hi, it-it's Rachel. Yeah, I'm fine. I-I saw

Barry today. Oh, yeah, yeah he-he told me. No, no, it's okay. I hope you

two are very happy, I really do. Oh, oh, and Mind, y'know, if-if everything

works out, and you guys end up getting married and having kids- and everything- I just hope they have his old hairline 发线 and your old nose.（瑞秋放下电话，对大伙说）Okay, I know it was a cheap shot, but I feel so much better now.