I'd like to show you a magic bar graph. This is the result of discover your communication style questionnaire. As you can see, I got 1 point in direct, zero in initiating, 9 points in supportive and 2 points in analytical. I am totally a supportive communicator.
What is supportive communication style?
This style is calm, steady, approachable, sincere, and gentle. Because the person with a supportive communication style dislike change, she may appear indecisive. More often she perceived as careful, patient. Due to her active listening skills, others see her as cooperative, dependable, and loyal.
She is often modest and prefers praise be given privately. Patient and slow-paced, she likes a personal, relaxed, no-tension environment. She puts high priority on close relationships and does not like conflict, but may mediate if necessary.
Now, you know what is supportive communication style. Is this also your communication style or your family members, your friends? Who do you think has this communication style in our club? I feel that Ada and Rena, their communication style is also supportive.
Next, I’d like to show you how does this supportive communication style impacts my interaction with others?
Firstly, I like the steady environment and dislike change.
In 2016, I attended the meeting of Jinan XDF TMC and liked it so much, so I decided to join it and became a member of Jinan XDF TMC for 2 years. During the 2 year, I attended almost all of meetings and I only absent for 1 or 2 times. Attending TMC meeting becomes a routine of my life and I like to gather with my friends.
In my L1P1 speech HEY I BACK, I shared that when I came to Shanghai I didn’t join any TMC club for half a year. Now I figure out why it take me such a long time to join a new club? That’s because I dislike change and I hesitate a lot and don’t want to want to make a decision. So it took me half a year to rejoin a TMC club. Thank God, finally, I joined our wonderful club and make friends with you guys.
Secondly, I am a really a good listener.
At first, I didn’t know why my friends enjoy talking to me, they would share their feelings, their stories with me. As I grew up, I realized that I am a good listener, I listened my friends carefully, gave them responses and I understood their feelings. That’s why they enjoyed talking with me.
And there is funny story when I was in junior high school. I had two close friends A and B and they both like talking with me a lot. Teenage girls always have lots things want to share. One day, I realized that they don’t like each other but they both want me to be their own best friends, A didn’t want me to play with B. B also didn’t want me to play with A. I still don’t know why? I had to balance A with B. They are both my friends listened to them.
Thirdly, I like the relaxed and no-tension environment.
I have never initiated a quarrel with anyone. There are just several times that others want to have a quarrel with me. I will try to avoid quarrel or even run away. In an extreme example, my friend C in college he did some things wrong and said some bad words, I was so angry and decided to break off the friendship and I didn’t speak him for several years.
When I could not run away from conflicts, I usually act as a mediator. In my family, sometimes my teenager little sister didn’t communicate with my parents in an appropriate manner. On one hand, I usually talked to her and let her realized that is not appropriate. On the other hands, I talked with my parents that she didn’t mean it.
So, how to communicate with supportive communicator in our life?
Use a calm, steady approach. Earn their trust by providing them with plenty of reassurance. When seeking their opinions and ideas, encourage them to express their concerns and allow them time to make decisions.
All in all, there is no good or bad communication style, the important thing is to communicate with others in a way that is comfortable and effective. And tailor our communication style to match situational expectation.
