Summary
To be a highly effective person ,we need to renew the four dimensions of our nature—physical ,spiritual ,mental and social / emotional . It requires us to learn, commit, and do on an upward spiral of growth.
The physical ,spiritual ,and mental dimensions are closely related to Habit 1,2 and 3—centered on the principles of personal vision , leadership and management . The social/emotional dimension focuses on Habit 4, 5 and 6—centered on the principles of interpersonal leadership ,empathic communication ,and creative cooperation .
The Private Victory covers Habit 1, 2 and 3. Habit 1(Be proactive) says,” You are the creator”. Habit 2 (Begin with the end in mind) is the first or mental creation and it means to start with a clear understanding of our destination. The most effective way to live Habit 2 is to develop a personal mission statement. Habit 3(Put first things first) is the second creation or physical creation. It empowers us to identify the deepest priorities in our life through the lens of importance rather than urgency. In a word, Habit 1 and 2 are prerequisite to Habit 3.
Habit 4, 5 and 6 belong to the Public Victory. Habit 4 (think win/win) is a belief in the Third Alternative, coming from a character of integrity, maturity and the Abundance Mentality; Habit 5(Seek first to understand, then to be understood) encourages us to develop empathic listening and come up with Win/Win solutions; Habit 6 (Synergize) is the crowning achievement of all the previous habits and valuing the differences is the essence of the synergy. Last but not least, Habit 7 (Sharpen the saw) means exercising all four dimensions or above six habits in a wise and balanced way.
What is the relationship between the Private Victory and the Public Victory, or interaction among the seven habits? In brief, the Private Victory (Habit 1, 2 and 3) is the the foundation for the Public Victory (Habit 4, 5 and 6) and completely within our circle of influence .
读书感悟
全书读完，习惯1到习惯7，对我而言感触比较深有几点：一是内心的强大（to be proactive）是何等重要。生活中我们太容易活在别人的评价中，别人的价值观中，在碌碌中追求着别人眼中所谓的成功，功名利禄中渐渐迷失自我。终吾一生，什么是真正重要的东西？直到看了这本书，我才真正开始反思，之前生活中精力被太多紧急而不重要、或是既不紧急也不重要的事情牵绊，每天活得忙忙碌碌，到头却落个碌碌无为。人生的旅途中，偏离了方向却茫然不知，是为何？是因为从来没有践行习惯3（begin with end in mind）,从来没有问过自己的内心，找到人生中指引自己不偏离航线的灯塔。读了这本书促使我在考虑personal mission statement , 促使我在自问，什么是人生中真正重要的东西？一点点to be proactive , 内心强大，坦然追求生命中对于自己而言最重要的东西，践行put first things first 。
二是，在看了这本书之后，我突然发现两件一直以来忽视的、在象限2中不紧急但是很重要的事—一件是读书，这件遗忘很久的事也是今年才开始捡起。虽然读书这件事，不会效果立现，但是那种you are what you read 的气息，以及在读书群中synergy的舒畅，让我开始接受这样一种与书相伴，掩卷沉思的美好体验。看到朱光潜先生的一句话：“文艺的珍贵雨露浸润到我灵魂的至深处，我是一个再造过的我，创造主就是我自己”。期待这样一种境界…..
另一件事情就是锻炼身体，书中提到在四个方面的提升中，首先就是体能提升，书中说到大多数人的状态：Exercise is one of those Quadrant Ⅱ， high-leverage activities that most of us don’t do consistently because it isn’t urgent .And because we don’t do it , sooner or later we find ourselves in QuadrantⅠ,dealing with the health problems and crises that come as a natural result of our neglect.长期疏于管理，久坐懒动，多少人待在“舒适区”里温水煮青蛙，幡然醒悟之时为时已晚！所以我也动了每天运动的心思，目前是处于抗拒的阶段。 “you won’t like it at first ,You may even hate it .But be proactive . Do it anyway .”啥也别说了，跑起来！相信度过抗拒期，也许会爱上跑步呢？
三是，习惯4(Think Win/Win)对我的启发很大，更多地让我意识到生活不是“你有我无、你输我赢”的单选题，改变思维模式，单选变多选哦！ 那么如何实现共赢呢？“to separate the person from the problem , to focus on interests and not on positions， to invent options for mutual gain , and to insist on objective criteria that both parties can buy into ” 处理问题时，人和事分开，抛开立场，关注共同利益，寻求双赢，何尝不是好的解决方案？
四是，意识自己在“seek first to understand”的方面的欠缺，太急于表达自己，太急于下结论，如何改变以往evaluate 、probe、advice 和interpret的套路，学会rephrase the content and reflect the feeling 的方法，放下“自己的执念”，确实需要修炼。
在七个习惯的习得过程中，不断的践行总结方可实现螺旋上升。此书的魅力之处就在paradigm shift，解答了很多困惑我问题，促使我反思在个人成长和人际交往中的思维模式。困惑之时，拿出来再读，相信每次读都会有不同的感悟，因为这本身就是learn, commit and do 的知行合一。
学习方法小结
此次读书，平时因为时间的关系，没法每天写笔记，但是尽量一周写一次小结。一开始写一周小结很费劲，每次写summary的时候大脑都是一片空白，读过的东西一点印象都没有，只好再看，耗时耗力。后来看到群中小伙伴每天提交笔记，手写导图或结构很受启发。于是在看书的时候，一边看一边写小结，每看完一小节，就列些要点或用两句话概括下本小节内容，如果遇到可以作为summary用的句子就重点标注下，这样看完一章，实际上内容已经经过了大脑的筛选，本子上基本有了框架和重点内容，写小结的时候就轻松很多。 其次，在读书的时候，会比较注意同一个意思的多种表达，记在本子上，方便做字词总结。最后，需要改进的地方是，平时看的时候，只是勾画出来生词或可以学习的句子，再做最后字词大总结的时候，还得重头梳理。所以今后看书的时候，每天的内容看完后按照类别对新学稍微分下类（如新词、句式、多种表达等）简单记下页数和单词句子，相当于做了预处理，可以方便后期筛选整理词汇。
多种表达
1.以己之见揣度别人的多种表达：To project our intentions on the behavior of others/ to read their autobiography into other people’s lives / to prescribe their own glasses for others / …because we listen autobiographically / from our own frame of reference/ with autobiographical advice and “I told you so’s”/
2.一致:We align ourselves with correct principles./you are in alignment with the emotional thrust of another person’s communication. / be in(out of) harmony with / be congruent with /
3.固执己见: …be deeply embedded in /be deeply scripted in / deep-seated tendencies/be deeply ingrained in /be deeply planted in /to engrave it in hearts /
4.表示前后关系;A is followed by B/ Each succeeding wave created a surge of social and personal progress / Each generation builds on the one before /As each generation builds on those that have preceded it . / it would take precedence over your personal visit.
5.践行：to live the principles (values or habits )/ walk the talk/ walk the walk /to keep commitments to ourselves /it’s honor with self / 联想talk the talk/you can translate each goal to a specific day of the week /
6.解释说明:we can begin to give expression to what we want to be / in seeking to give verbal expression to that uniqueness /More studies will throw more light on brain functioning /to paraphrase sb/
7.时间的经过：several years down the road / How valuable that time is downstream !/ One of the interesting things to me was how little time had elapsed before there was a sufficient thrust to create such synergy ./day by day/ day-in and day-out/ moment-by-moment/
8.回顾：look back on my life / In retrospect /
9.相信：to buy into / to give credence to/
10.偶见：I came across his statement / you run into a friend /
11.等等： ……, among other things / …..., and so forth .
几个句子
1.千里之行始于足下：A thousand-mile journey begins with the first step.
2.One person’s mission is another person’s minutiae /联想：one man’s meat is another man’s poison
3.Do unto others as your would have others do unto you.
4.I‘ll sweet-talk to your face and bad-mouth you behind your back.
几个定律
1.Pygmalion effect 皮格马利翁效应：The phenomenon in which the greater the expectation placed upon people, the better they perform.
2.The Pareto Principle—80 percent of the results flow out of 20 percent of the activities . 帕雷托定律（二八定律）
几个短语
1、I get myself psyched up =prepare sb for sth mentally 打气/ we attempted to psych him up using positive mental attitude techniques .
2、I am eating my heart out.
3、he walked me to the drinking fountain .
4、 Beat around the bush: be deliberately ambiguous or unclear in order to mislead or withhold information 旁敲侧击、含糊其辞
5、…potential problems can be nipped in the bud. 防患于未然
几个单词
1.It was the serendipitous fruit of a PC investment. (=not planned but has a good result ) 有意外收获的
2.Others will sense that duplicity (=dishonest behavior)/ …and fail to build reserves of trust if they are inwardly duplicitous .
3.But work and money, per se provide no wisdom.
4.Because you aren’t omniscient (=know everything), you can’t always know in advance what is truly important.
5.They feel justified (=prove that sth is reasonable) in what they did.
