recently,I seemed to have no power again.For one reason, I cost much of my time to contact with YinYu for my travel to NanChang, though, I finally decided not went for our strained relation.
I think,I should have a close relationship with my classmates or roomates. However, I scared, I have no ability to maitain our close friendship. I think, I like to do many things by myself, I hate to do anything more for faking others to like me. I hate them make a lot noises, I hate there are so much unitive.
Even more, I wanted to move away, quarrel to them in my nightdream. I hate them very much.Though they sometimes do somthing touched me,they are always not in one line with me. I hate them extreme thoughts,I hate them talk other in back, I even thought, they will talk about me when I am not there.
Finally,nobody understand me, include my sister and my brother. I begin to reflect myself, maby,I just hate myself,hate I can not tolerate standing close to others, hate I always want to be the best, hate I seem to too sensetive to others, hate I always have much nervous to share my really moods, hate I merely have no one could be trust, hate I always be too kind, too foolish,too cowardly. I even wanted to kill them,if one day,something supassed my control, I could not ensure what I will do.
My ear have more meat leaves,it seemed more inflated. I thought the life is so mieciless. I seem to have no hope, but when I saw a girl with walk stick. I thought she is still try her best to live, how can I give up so easily?
I thought, I want to get a better school, but it is just my imagine. I seemed to hard to live on,how can I do.Chinese education is so hard, jow can I do.
