The following story is written in English so my mom, an active user here at Jianshu, wouldn't know this still hurts me.
The darkest time of my life (so far) happened 10 years ago, when my first baby died 11 days after he was born.
The entire pregnancy was quite uneventful until one day, I found myself bleeding heavily and had to be admitted to the hospital. My water had already broken two weeks before, but that being my first pregnancy, I thought it was just incontinence which was not uncommon at 6 1/2 months. Being born over 2 months early was never good news, as the survival rate was quite low. But optimistic as I was, I still believed that the baby would turn out okay if I prayed hard and stayed positive.
Since the baby was small, the birthing process was very smooth. Once he came out, he was immediately taken away from me to neonatal pediatricians and nurses for special care. I didn't even get to hear the baby cry.
The following 11 days were hope, distress, and fear all rolled into one. To make the story short, on 3/30/2008, my first baby died. It was the only time I saw my husband cry.
